Navigating conversations about puberty with your child

These conversations help children understand the changes they will experience, reducing fear and confusion. They also ensure they receive accurate and age-appropriate information, preventing misinformation from friends or online sources. By discussing these topics early, you create an environment of trust and openness, encouraging your child to come to you with any questions or concerns. Understanding concepts such as consent and personal boundaries also empowers children to seek help if needed. 

Preparing for the conversation: 

Preparing for these conversations can make them feel more natural and less awkward. Here are some steps you can take to prepare: 

• Educating yourself: Learn as much as you can from reliable resources to feel more confident when discussing puberty.  

• Practice: If certain words or topics feel uncomfortable, practising them in advance can make it easier.  

• Anticipate questions: Anticipating questions and thinking about how to respond can also help you navigate trickier topics calmly.  

• Keep it casual: Aim for a friendly chat to reassure your child that puberty is a normal part of life.  

Effective communication strategies: 

When your child asks a question, it’s important to respond in a way that encourages open communication. For simple questions, try the following approach: 

1. Repeat the question: Clarify their curiosity by repeating the question back to them. 
2. Provide a clear answer: Give a simple, factual response.
3. Check understanding: Ask them to explain it in their own words to ensure they grasp the information. 
4. Encourage further questions: Invite them to ask more without fear of judgement.  

For more complex topics, start by finding out what your child already knows. This allows you to tailor your response to their level of understanding and correct any misconceptions they may have. If you don’t know the answer toa question, it’s perfectly fine to admit it. Turning it into an opportunity to find out together reinforces that learning is a lifelong process.  

Tips for positive and productive conversations: 

Staying calm and open is key to making these conversations positive and productive. Here are some additional tips: 

1. Listen without judgement: Allow your child to express their thoughts and feelings freely.   
2. Discuss values:  Share your personal and family values in an age-appropriate way helps children understand different perspectives.  
3. Use everyday moments: Take advantage of natural opportunities such as watching TV or reading books together, to start discussions.
4. Seek support: If you need additional guidance, there are plenty of expert resources available to guide you. 

If you’re looking for more guidance on talking to your child about puberty, these resources may be helpful: 

• Generation Next 

• Family Planning NSW – Tips for parents 

• Better Health Channel – Parenting through puberty 

By following these strategies and tips, you can create a supportive environment for discussing puberty with your child. Remember, you don’t need to be an expert, and it’s okay to say “I don’t know.” What matters most is maintaining open and honest dialogue that encourages your child to approach you with questions or concerns.  

The Talk About It puberty education module that Life Ed NSW, ACT, NT and SA teaches in schools encourages children to communicate with safe adults about personal development. Our Talk About It program equips students with helpful age-appropriate strategies to understand puberty and sexual health in their lives.